Contacting a professional dominant for the first time can be daunting, regardless of your experience level. After all, they are in the business of unseating power and administering pain, both of which can be scary things to confront in another human being. The following guidelines for proceeding with the Domina Kathryn in a way that will ensure her happiness (and who doesn’t want that?). Some of this information is specific to her, but much of it you will also find helpful in your dealings with other professionals, BDSM or otherwise.
Courtesy – First and foremost, it is important to know that when you come to see the Domina Kathryn you will be spending time with someone who will treat you with consideration, respect, and discretion. You are expected to offer her the same in return. You should address her as “Domina” or “Your Ladyship” / “My Lady”.
– To request a session with the Domina Kathryn use the form provided herein on the Contact page or send an email directly to her. You should be respectful and polite in making your request for a session. You will then be sent her New Submissives Questionnaire for you to reply to. This Questionnaire covers your interests, fantasies, desires, as well as your limits and basic information necessary for screening.
– Any rude or impolite emails will be ignored as well and deleted without a response from the Domina Kathryn. This includes requests for sex acts or nudity.
– The Domina Kathryn has a very firm “3 Email Policy” (3 Emails from each of you). Her website is comprehensive and exhaustively lists what she will, and what she will not do, in her Domestic Domination practice. However, if you feel you still have questions after the exchange of emails, then you are strongly encouraged to use her Nite Flirt line to telephone her and to ask her any additional questions.
Before you email her the first time:
Take stock of your interests and desires, then read this web site thoroughly. SHE worked hard to make sure it accurately represents her and what SHE does (and does NOT) offer. Neither of you is interested in wasting time and energy on an encounter that proves frustrating because you are working at cross-purposes. Making sure that your interests and expectations are in line prior to meeting is the surest route to helping create a delightful BDSM exchange. When you first contact the Domina Kathryn, you will be provided with her NEW SUBMISSIVE QUESTIONNAIRE. You should answer the questions completely and return it to her by email. She will then telephone you to introduce herself and arrange for your session.
Then when you speak to her on the telephone:
Your first conversation is a time to speak intelligently and exchange information. Of course, it always helps to be polite, respectful, and to answer her questions honestly and concisely. When in doubt about whether you share an interest, please ask. SHE cannot be shocked nor offended. During the telephone call together, you will arrange a day and time to meet for your session. SHE will follow this up with a Confirmation Email confirming the day and time and providing you with her address and simple directions.
SHE has established procedures for setting up sessions, confirming appointments, and granting admission to her play space. Therefore, it cannot be stressed enough that before you contact her, please read through this web site, then check over the following list of her limits:
The Domina Kathryn will NOT engage in play that involves:
Alcohol or other inebriants
Full toilet training (Brown Showers)
Vomit (Roman Showers)
Edge Play / Blood
Her sessions focus exclusively on BDSM. Kindly refrain from contacting her if you are looking for a directly sexual service.
For your planning needs: Please note that the Domina Kathryn requires at least 24 hours advance notice – with 48 hours or more preferred. SHE refuses ALL requests for same day/last minute requests from new guests as it takes time and thought to planning a session.
Established Guests: Please feel free to contact her via email (preferred) or telephone for an appointment. Be sure to include a few possible dates and times when you write.
Please treat the appointments you make with her as you would an appointment with any other professional. If you find you need to cancel or reschedule, you may do so via telephone at least 24 hours prior to your appointment time. If you cancel for any reason within 24 hours of your scheduled time together, you are responsible for paying for the missed session, and due before SHE would consider rescheduling.
If you cancel your first appointment with the Domina Kathryn, SHE will require a deposit of $300 be paid to her via Pay Pal before she will consider re-booking you. That deposit is credited to your session … but if you cancel again, for any reason, the deposit is forfeit.
When the Domina Kathryn has determined your mutual compatibility after reviewing your responses to the Questionnaire and your other emails, she will give you instructions on how to book the session by telephone. During your phone conversation a date and time for the session will be confirmed and booked. You will then be given instructions on how to confirm the session with the Domina Kathryn the day of the session. You will be given the location of her private play space the day of the session when you confirm.
Do not arrive early or late. If you get to the area early do not expect to be let in. If you are going to be more than five minutes early or late, you must telephone the Domina Kathryn at the private number she provides you at the time of Confirmation.
Basic Sessions: Her suggested donation is $300 per hour in cash. Whether you are a novice or more experienced player, SHE enjoys collaborating and designing unique scenes that incorporate your mutual interests in BDSM, fetish, and Tantra. You are invited to review this website and express your desires through the Domina Kathryn’s Contact form.
Extended Scenes and Immersion Intensives: These scenes are uniquely customized to your fantasies and pushing the envelope on their realities. Rates will vary.
Training Sessions – For the submissive who demonstrates sincerity and worthiness in his/her desire for an enduring D/s relationship. Each supplicant brings a unique set of proclivities, desires, and abilities to the Domina Kathryn. Her desire in training you ranges from deepening your psychological bond to her as your Mistress/Domina, and beyond – all of which require a foundation of trust and rapport. This training is the journey of finding your fulfillment within the Domina Kathryn. Elements may take place outside of the scene as your training progresses and deepens. It is designed with the intention to become a well-compartmentalized but integral part of your life. Within training, the possibilities are wide-ranging.
Alternative Lifestyle Coaching – The Domina Kathryn offers consultations and coaching to both Dominants, submissives, switches, trans, and those who do not identify with any of these labels. You will start out by discussing in depth what your goals are and plan together on how to make them happen. She will give you tips and techniques for bringing power exchange into your relationship with yourself or others. She will train couples to pleasure each other and embrace and harmonize your respective kinks. The Domina Kathryn loves to help singles own their kinky nature and manifest a relationship that can honor it. You will learn how to negotiate a scene from the inside out – knowing your desires and limits so you can play in a heart and head conscious way, to further deepen your experience.
DARK TANTRA (Tantrassage/Bondassage) – For the Bold and Daring Individual who wants to try something different: The Domina Kathryn maintains a separate TANTRA practice (see www.DakiniKathryn.com) but she blends both TANTRA and BDSM together in her special DARK TANTRA sessions! Here, the Domina Kathryn uses Dark Tantra as a way to teach the male, otherwise so active and domineering, to receive: to lay back and awaken the body to new sensations and an erotic surrender that vanilla life so rarely encourages. A Dominatrix is not necessarily a woman who carries a whip, but a Goddess who can orchestrate your experience of adventure and pleasure. She goes into the shadow side with eyes wide open. Often Dark Tantra is an intriguing, peak experience for those who would otherwise never explore anything kinky but always have wanted to. It is based on an ancient practice of releasing energy stored in the body, allowing that energy to flow again. The kink elements allow the imagination to come in and to play in this skillful blending of Tantra Sensual Massage and Prostate Massage with Bondage and Domination/submission. Dark Tantra sessions are always for a minimum of two hours at a Special Rate of $600.
THE DOMINA KATHRYN’S GLOSSARY OF TERMS AND SERVICES:
BONDAGE – Psychological bondage, predicament bondage; SHE loves scenes that are about nothing but straight bondage, inescapable and solid. A variety of ropes are at hand to snare you in her web. Rope can be a part of a quick tie-down or, carefully woven, sliding over the skin for hours, binding you into a trance. With leather and metal SHE secures control of your body, in part or in entirety. Complex gags make protest futile. Prolonged bondage sessions and mummification are just as hypnotic for her as they will be for you.
CHASTITY CONTROL / KEY HOLDING – Possessing the key to your chastity device, SHE effectively owns your sexuality. This kind of ownership is easily hidden from the outside world but impossible for you to forget or ignore. The Domina Kathryn will select the method of containment and your training schedule. You may need to be locked up while you are together to prevent misbehavior in her presence. SHE finds it very useful to secure your device when you are outside of her supervision to ensure compliance and assert her ownership. The key SHE hangs in her special cabinet is a reminder that you belong to her and that SHE controls all access.
CORPORAL PUNISHMENT – A sound caning is one of the Domina Kathryn’s favourite things to administer and SHE is skilled and experienced with everything from lightweight nursery canes to heavier Delron or Lexan canes. Flogging can be a gradual warm-up for the endorphins and the skin, possibly building into a cathartic encounter with one’s deepest emotions. Other flavours of pain play that SHE enjoys include trampling, whipping, and intricate tortures like pins, sounds, hot wax, etdelightfullycetera …
DOMESTIC DISCIPLINE – Spanking is classic and timeless for a reason. Punitive, therapeutic, erotic… Taking someone over her knee can reinforce submission or provide an ordeal to be withstood and overcome. Strapping and paddling, particularly with a hairbrush, are her very favourite methods of physical discipline in a domestic context. Domestic discipline often involves other punishments administered for your own good, such as corner time, mouth soaping, and writing lines. SHE will guide you, ensuring that you do not stray from the path of good behavior.
HUMILIATION – Privately embarrassing and objectifying you is extremely entertaining for the Domina Kathryn. The burn of internal shame in a public setting is priceless. Even though SHE is the only one who knows your secret, you are terrified of being exposed. SHE might invite a group of Dominant Lady friends to join you in your degradation and exploitation or bring you out for an evening of display to an appreciative audience. Let your discomfort be her delight.
PAIN – Pain can be so cathartic! Corporal punishment, such as paddling and caning, are what many people think of first when they think of S&M. All play goes through the container that is the body, and corporal experiences can bring you into your body or take you beyond it. The Domina Kathryn is an empathetic and consensual sadist- SHE fantasizes about inflicting pain upon those for whom the pain is a pleasure worth pleading for.
SAFEWORDS – are ways for the submissive to assert limits during a session. The Domina Kathryn uses:
RED – for full stop;
AMBER – for proceed with caution;
GREEN – is implied but if you say it in a session, the Domina smiles 🙂
SENSUAL DOMINANCE – The Domina Kathryn weaves restraint of some form into almost every interaction, from restrictive verbal protocol and discreet chastity devices to complete immobilization and cocooning for painful tease and denial or total sensory deprivation and control. The physical restrictions which SHE orchestrates can bring you to a state of mental and emotional freedom.
SERVICE and SUBMISSION – Do you crave meaningful submission but fear that others won’t understand the value of your gift? As you let go of selfishness and control, prioritizing her desires, you will be one another’s treasures. Learn to follow her lead and find pure pleasure in the act of obedience. SHE will teach you about flexibility and in her hands you will become more present, more pleasing, more passive. Seize the opportunity to serve someone who adores being served, someone empowered by your deference. In service, you will beg for the opportunity to advance your skills, be of use, give back to her and to the world. You will have the opportunity surrender deeply in her presence because one of the greatest pleasures on earth is to belong to someone special.
TRADITIONAL CORRECTION – Most people, submissive or otherwise, benefit from the balancing effect of physical discipline. Within and beyond that you will find the art of mental and emotional discipline. Immediate or long term, applied discipline will focus you on service, on self-improvement, and on your place in my world.
TRAINING – Training is essential to any submissive spirit. In addition to education and drilling in general protocol and obedience, SHE enjoys providing rigorous instruction in domestic servitude, hussy training, and toilet slavery.